Everything gets better when it’s hot out.
There’s something gloriously freeing about the hair sticking to the sweat on the back of my neck, limp and heavy with perspiration. About freckles popping up across my nose and cheeks, like tattoos of summertime’s past reappearing. About light and breezy fabrics that float around my body effortlessly. About the reappearance of my cherished and treasured Birks, and the ugly tan lines they leave on my feet.
Often times you’ll hear of summer flings, of romances formed in the heat, blooming in the wake of the ground thawing. As the days grow longer happiness is infectious and people tend to find each-other, basking in the positive glow of warmth surrounding us all.
This year I’m experiencing the greatest romance of all, a love for life.
Recently I’ve found this joy that I cannot contain. I feel like I could explode with how happy I feel sometimes. I look at my best friend turned roommate, I look at our little home, I look at my writing and I just get excited to be alive.
I’ve found an authenticity that’s making me feel groovy and raw, I threw out my foundation and the rest of my makeup lays forgotten in it’s bag. I still love to douse myself in glitter and rock a red lip every once in awhile but there’s something so freeing about looking in the mirror and thinking I look beautiful bare faced.
I go bra-less more often than not. As someone who’s boobs have been their most prominent feature since puberty this was a reality I didn’t think I would ever be able to experience, but recently I’ve found I just don’t care. I’m most comfortable without a bra, and if people feel uncomfortable about that it’s not really any of their business anyways.
I dress ridiculously. I smile euphorically at strangers. In the nights as records spin and I am curled up on our thrifted furniture I feel like these are the best times of my life, happening right before my eyes. In the mornings I brew a pot of coffee for Asia and I and I pet the cat and each day feels like a story I don’t ever want to stop reading.
Today it is raining and cold, a brief pause in the heat we’ve been experiencing. I am on my third cup of coffee and I can hear Asia studying and typing in the next room. Music is playing quietly and I can hear rain against my window.
There have been so many times that I was sure I would never find happiness in my own body.
But now I am so in love with life that it hurts.
It’s funny how things can change.
until next time,